Since Covid hit the earth, travelling has never been better, mainly because it is free. You do not need visas. And you don’t have to leave your house – well, sorry, you CAN’T leave your house. Your dream travel destination has just come to you! Just switch on your TV, computer or cell phone. Watching polar bears in the North Pole, investigating the best route for that off-road 4x4 adventure, and buying hair dye from a virtual shop has never been easier. So, for all you travel enthusiasts out there, here are my five top rules for Covid Travel:
1.Do not waste time or money on getting visas. Leave your passport in the drawer. All Covid travel, for example going to the toilet, kitchen or balcony, are visa-free destinations.
2. Do not pack anything or worry about the weight of your suitcase. In fact, you don’t need a suitcase. Who needs an umbrella, anti-diarrhoea medicine or an extra pair of shoes to watch TV?
3. Have your phone fully charged at all times – you do not want to miss photo opportunities of you doing daring and fun activities, like building puzzles or making instant noodles.
4. Remember, you cannot claim travel insurance because your coffee stained the rug. Who takes a rug on holiday, anyway?
5. You probably do not have jet lag. Your fatigue and fixation on eating with plastic knives and forks are not the result of travelling across multiple time zones. Let me explain. Going from your bedroom to the kitchen is crossing only one time zone. Jet lag is caused by multiple time zones. Understand?
If you still feel unprepared for your Covid travel, just remember that “life is a journey, not a destination”. Really, who said that? My living room has been my destination for the last two months – it took me four seconds to get from the kitchen to the living room, and I have the whole sofa to myself.
What happened to 16-hour non-stop flights, being squashed in a middle seat, while having an “in-flight snack” of seven salted peanuts? Or driving on pot-holed roads through lion-infested bush veld with a 4x4 fitted with a snorkel, in case you have to submerge through crocodile-infested rivers?
Covid happened. Breath in, breath out … and count your blessings. Because when life gets back to normal you probably won’t have time.
“Life is a journey, not a destination.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson